Sunday Update - 08/03/26

This week has been rough, and feels like it could be the beginning of the end for me freelancing.

Art alone is no longer making ends meet and hasn’t done for several months. Opportunities are less frequent and regardless of how many emails I send the only ones I receive are spam or asking me to endorse Gen AI - which is a real kick in the teeth.

The main reason I came back to social media was to have a living portfolio to share alongside my website. One last attempt at making something happen - but I just feel like a glorified pens salesman at this point (without commission I hasten to add).

I’m at a loss and it’s starting to come through in my work. Honestly, I don’t know how much of what I’ve been drawing and writing I’m willing to share, but maybe my collapse will be entertaining (I’m being sarcastic). 

It’s been more reflective, downbeat and self-flagellant. Then again, art is the therapy I can afford and it’s the only thing that calms the riot. This is me coming to terms with my problems. I don’t want to come across as if I’m mining for sympathy. I’m okay, just lonely, disheartened - the brave face is beginning to crack.

Anyway, I’m starting to think that this month’s artbook could be the last. The demand just isn’t there and I’m running out of time to make something like that work. My hope was to move further away from social media and offer up something honest, but it’s been a hard sell. And I totally get it. I know, it takes time for anything to gain traction, but I could do with prioritising my time on finding work (at least for the foreseen future). The same goes for this blog honestly. This could be the last one of these for a while.

Urgh, sorry for the dower shade of this post. Like I said, it’s just been a rough week. Lots of let downs and realisations - and I’m no good at pretending I’m fine, but I’m sure I will be. I believe myself to be a glass half-fill kinda person, but I’m getting thirsty and there doesn’t seem to be enough water in that glass anymore.

I’m still undecided on what to do next, but I have my CV written and ready to go. I’m hoping to find something in healthcare again, but we’ll see. I’m still chewing on whether or not I’ll continue to share my artwork, but I’ll cross that bridge as and when I need to.

Thank you for reading this if you made it over here, and thanks to everyone who has offered me support and advice over the years. It wasn’t for nothing, but times are changing and I’m slow to adapt.

Much love,

Alex